Stay Sane Through Change

Stay Sane Through the Valentine Season

Date : February 13, 2007

Stay Sane Tips for the Valentine Season –February 13, 2007

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Tips and Tools for Staying on top of your challenging
situation

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Thank you for downloading our free e-book Stay Sane through
The First Holiday Season After Your Divorce.

We believe you found the contents useful in your situation.
We have some exciting news for you.

NEWS:

This summer, we will be launching a monthly newsletter with
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challenges.

You will have access to more tools to empower you to use
periods of change as stepping stones to a greater future.

You will also have the opportunity to share your stories
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TIPS FOR CELEBRATING THE VALENTINE SEASON WHEN YOU HAVE
RECENTLY GONE THROUGH A DIVORCE

This valentine season, millions of ‘love’ notes are being
shared by people all over the world. There are ‘love’
decors everywhere and ‘love’ themes in the air. Some people
install love rings on their cell phones; download free love
songs and movies on their mp3 players. The whole world is
going ‘love crazy’.

All these gadgets and events are ways in which people
celebrate how they were captivated by the love of someone
special. The ‘un-engaged’ on the other hand use the time to
dream, imagine, and wish for a love of their life to show
up somehow miraculously.

Grown-ups and younger folks play games and go to all length
in a bid to ‘win someone’s heart’ for the first time or
over again. We all crave for love; have the need to be
appreciated, a need to be held in a place of unique ranking
in someone’s heart. That is just the way we are designed.

However, you may be facing a challenging period in your
life when all these romantic themes and decors seem to be a
‘distraction’ or something you would rather not think
about.

It could be that you have recently gone through a divorce
and the wounds are still very fresh in your heart. All your
hopes of previous years when you met your ex-spouse had
been dashed. You may be blaming yourself for the break
down in the relationship. On the other hand, if your spouse
had left you for another partner, you may be feeling
unwanted and dejected. You may be asking ‘What is there to
celebrate anyway?’

We recognize the challenges you may be going through during
this period. We want to encourage you not to give up.
Romantic themes can actually help heal your heart and ease
the pain you are going through. Here are some tips and
suggestions for spending your valentine season during this
transition period of your life.

TIPS:


1. Release yourself from the hurt of the past. You need to
forgive your ex-spouse. Make a deliberate decision NOT to
take the hurts of the past as a ‘sacred’ thing. For
healing to take place, you need to let go of them.


2. Acknowledge once again that love is a much needed part
of your life. Yes, you have always known this, but taking
time to recognize it in a new way is always a good start
for the season. Do not try and shut people out of your life
especially during this season


3. Try something different this valentine season. If you
have children living with you, use this valentine period to
re-assure them about your love for them.


4. Find other creative ways of spending the Valentine
season. Try not to be alone especially during the first
Valentine’s Day after your divorce. Here are some
suggestions:

a. Attend a valentine party in a community setting. Share
your memories with others.


b. You may even try something bold. Invite other friends
who have been through a divorce to a valentine party.


5. Find some support in your community. Join groups of
other people in your situation. Sharing your stories in
such a setting will give you re-assurance that you are not
alone in your struggles

6. This valentine season could actually become a season of
healing for you. You need to play a part in this. You need
to allow yourself to be loved again. Love is a reciprocal
thing. To get love, give some away.

We wish you a peaceful Valentine season.


Dave Webster and Tolu Adeleye, authors and life-change
experts, through their consultancy provide you and your
clients with tools for dealing with life transitions. Their
areas of expertise include family- and career-related
transitions.


Copyright Contemporary Lifestyle Consulting Inc. 2007
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